I need to visit Poland ASAP

I'm consistently amused when I see foreign posters for American film. This ad for "The Hangover" circulated around France last summer and would always inspire a chuckle or more from me, based on my perception of its absurdity.

Well, any ideas I had about the humor of these reinterpretations were put into place when I saw Cracked's list of outlandish international posters for American films; these gems run the full range from "haha those crazy foreigners!" to "Wow, are they even talking about the same movie??" Turns out, Eastern Europe, circa the 80s really had the craaaaaazy-ass interpretations thing goin' on. They have some real off-the rocker posters over in the region, but it seems Poland had a desperate need to claim the "WTF?" cake.

Some of my favorites - all of which are of course from Poland - below.

The Fly

Now with 50% more puking?

Weekend at Bernies

Isn't this supposed to be some wacky comedy about some screwball kids whose boss dies, which causes them to engage in a series of cover-up shenanigans? Or is it a movie about Soviet-era optical surgery as performed by stout fingers?? I'm confused.

Planet of the Apes 2

Wow. Just....wow.

SXSW Preview - Alphabeat

An internal dialogue from the mind of Nishiquah, circa earlier today:

"Oh my GOD!! Is Alphabeat really coming to SXSW? Really? This is beyond amazing; need to post about it STAT!"

-big happy grin spreads across face-

"But wait; can I really admit to the world my secret love for a Danish band who my Danish friends themselves tear apart for being ridiculously corny and over-the-top poppy?? Sure, my Danish friends are so hip they eat NME mags for breakfast and cigarettes & irony for dinner, but this is still a band who cites Madonna and 90s  dance music as their primary inspiration for their latest album. Yikes much?"

-furrows brow, indicating consternation-

"Surely I can. I mean, I regularly publicly admit to loving Abba and the Spice Girls. Doesn't Alphebeat's kitschy factor rank up their with the latter & former? Afterall, this Danish band has everything from synchronized hand-claps in their vids to highly ridiculous song titles such as 'Hole in my Heart' and 'Boyfriend.' Titles that could have easily belonged to the Spice or Abba. Yes, yes it's OK to publicly admit to liking loving them."

-breaths sigh of relief-

"Ooooh but the color-coordinated outfits. I forgot about those. I mean, they are pretty bad. Reaaaally bad, actually. The only thing that would make it worse - or better? - would be some matching burgundy ascots."

-curls lip in deep thought-

"OK, but a lot of bands are outfitted in a coordinated manner. I mean, legit bands like N'Sync and BSB cira 1998 wore matchy matchy stuff!! Also, Alphabeat has a male-female lead vocalist duo, which is so hip these days. Plus, the male is easy peasy, lemon-squeezy on the eyes. Surely that makes it more acceptable to like them?"

 

-quizzical realization hits, causing further reflection-

"Yes but then the lead female vocalist goes and mucks it all up with her dedication to truly awful headwear. Just look at this tin foily, antenna-emulating atrocity!"

//all pics via alphabeat myspace//

"Oh what the hell. I need coffee. Here, let's re-watch my favorite vid by them and ponder their spartan schedule."

Friday, March 19 at 12:45 AM La Zona Rosa
Saturday, March 20th at Perez Hilton Party, time TBD

"Can't change who I am or what I like, and apparently neither can Alphabeat. Bring on the easy cheesy."

-End monologue-

Inglorious, yet so glorious

OK, I had to take a break from all the SXSW prep to give a shot out to the latest Best Supporting Actor Oscar winner, Austrian actor Christoph Waltz. In addition to being a seriously legit thesp (he gave me the creeeeepers in "Inglorious Basterds"), he makes fun of himself with such great panache this video that it makes his turn as a menacing Nazi general seem harmless and teddy bear-like:

We're all just humping. You know.